Tag: Attachment

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  • Why You Shouldn't Grant Your Teen a Divorce

    "I'm afraid I might just disappear"

    In my early twenties I facilitated a workshop with middle schoolers around the theme of courage. The teachers warned me that one student might be a bit difficult to deal with. “She’s always acting out and challenging authority,” one of the teachers said.

    The workshop went along uneventfully until one of the... 

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  • Building Trust With Your Child

    I just wrote a blog post about a core ingredient of self-discipline: trust. Trust is not built on single interactions but in the accumulation of experiences over time. Let's make those count.

    We build trust by:

    • Connecting. Predictable and close relationships with caregivers is the foundation... 
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  • Trust Us: Another Take on the Marshmallow Test

    "Moot!" my son exclaimed happily. "More moot!" In order to make sure that he got his message through to me he proudly showed me his empty milk glass. I reassured him that I would return to the dining room with more milk after I checked in on dinner simmering on the stove. For a thirsty two-year-old, "right back" can feel like an eternity.

    My son happily gulped down the milk upon my... 

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  • 10 Ways to Form Secure Attachment With Your Baby

    I just wrote a post about the importance of forming a secure attachment with your baby. Here are ten ways you can make sure that you are putting your baby on the path towards independence and self-discipline:

    1. Don't ignore your baby's cries. Respond to her cries of distress by trying to figure out what is wrong and soothing... 
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  • Spoiled baby or secure attachment?

    Dr. Dave, I know that you do a lot of research on self-discipline and self reliance. I work with new parents and many are worried about "spoiling" their babies by responding immediately to their cries and picking them up. How should I respond?

    Cheryl, Mississippi

    ... 

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  • It is never to late to connect

    Are children doomed from the very beginning if they do not form a strong attachment to their caregivers in the first 18 months of their lives?

    Valerie, Florida

    Valerie, Thanks for your question. When we learn about the importance of one-on-one interaction, connection, and consistent caregiving in early childhood, it certainly... 

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